Monday, December 7, 2009
Reflection 15: I once was a little Einstein
College has just exasperated the worst in me. ADD Katie is not good, studious Katie. I've really been devolving since childhood. I was originally very bright and very mature. I got all A's and never missed a homework assignment. I can't say the same about myself anymore. And the funny thing is, my younger self totally predicted this. I live right next to a college town, New Brunswick, aka Rutgers-land. I remember once in my youth when I was driving down a street in Rutgers. We were stopped at light and I saw a bunch of college kids running around like total idiots. I thought to little self, "What a bunch of idiots. These teenagers are retarded, but then again all are. I, being dubbed as quite mature by various adults, don't act like that. Maybe you devolve when you become a teenager. Like you're real smart as a kid, then become stupider and stupider as you become a teenager." Okay, I didn't think it in those exact words, but I legit had this theory that teenagers were got stupider as they went through puberty. And it looks like I was right. Boy, what a genius I was. Damn puberty.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Final Reflection
Throughout this semester, when I had to describe my classes to friends and family, Explorations was the hardest for me to define. When asked what we were reading, I shilled out a list of what must have been totally incongruous titles and authors. When asked about what I was writing, I attempted to connect relatively familiar topics like blog posts and new concepts like ethnographies. And when asked what I was learning, I often had to respond with a blank stare or resort to a rambling mumble before changing the subject.
But what did I learn? Actually, one of the most profound effects this class had for me was helping me to identify my personal values. While I've always had a vague idea about what I believe, the assignments and discussions in class have kind of worked like a lens to help me focus on and clarify exactly what these beliefs are (and I have had a wide range of material draw from- we have covered aspects ranging from human nature to the basic functions of tact, from a thorough look at spirituality to personality tests). I can actually define them now, put words to what before were just emotions and images.
I still don't know what my future holds, or what my role in life will entail. I am honestly not that worried about it. I have been blessed with opportunities that 99% of the world's population will never have; I think I, and all college students, should start from there and know just how fortunate we all are. What you have is not nearly as important as what you do with it; this applies to education perhaps more than anything else.
Finally, I just want to say that I really appreciate all the members of this UC. I know that I personally was one of the quietest members of the class, and when discussions began to wander my concentration was soon to follow. However, the majority of the discussions were insightful and clearly opined, if perhaps just a little circuitous. I am glad that our class had a diverse set of opinions, and that each member offered something of their own to the topic, whether it was a personal story to develop the conversation or a touch of humor to lighten tension. Oh no, I'm getting emotional. Seriously, if you could see me right now, I'm pretty close to tears. And its all because of you beautiful people.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Reflections
FINAL REFLECTION
Upon entering American University, I had the intentions of getting my bachelors in Business Administration with a speciailzation in International Business. I had the goals of becoming a high ranking executive in some international company. Though this still may end up being my ultimate goal, I feel like I need to do a little exploring into other options before I settle on that because of some experiences I've had in this class.
One thing that struck me when President Kerwin came in was how strategic his behavior was. I don't want to have to stragecially plan what I'm going to say and put up a front all the time. Though I know with every profession people will always be putting up fronts, I think this would particularly important for a high ranking executive. Another realization I had was when I read Habits of the Heart. I have always wanted to move out of my small hometown to a big city where there's something always going on. As I read Habits of the Heart, I found myself put off by the people who soley focused on their careers (I think his name was Brian) and more drawn to the fourth character who was focused on his community and his small town. This amazed me because all through high school I just wanted to get out of my small town and move on.
I'm conflicted. Small towns have reputation for being "behind the times." What am I going to a well-respected university and getting my degree in International Business for if living in a small town is what makes me happy? I think this is just really a more nostalgic feeling. In all reality, small towns really aren't as quaint as they're idealized to be...especially in movies (like "Hannah Montana: the Movie" which I'm doing my final assignment on!) In all reality, I really don't think I'll end up living in a small town, but the big city vs. small town community is a value that I question when thinking about my future.
I won't end up being a person like the fourth character of Habits of the Heart. Its a good ideal, but because of what our society is focused on, I don't think I'd feel successful. In all likelihood, I'll still probably end up majoring in International Business. I'll probably become involved in my career just like Brian in Habits of the Heart. I just hope that I don't get so caught up with my caeer that I let it negatively impact other equally, if not more, important aspects of my life.
Friday, December 4, 2009
LAST BLOG EVER!
Soooo, last blog reflection ever! I attempted writing this blog last night, and I drew a blank. I thought I would try to reflect on the semester as a whole, but then I realized that I had already sort of done that in my last two reflections. So I was drawing a complete blank last night and still would be today as to what to reflect on until my mom sent me a text message this morning.
One of my dad's closest friends found out five weeks ago that he had esophageal and pancreatic cancer. Unfortunately, I found out this morning from my mom that he passed away this past Tuesday. Now I had only met him like three times because him and his family lived so far away, but it really made me think about my life. The past few deaths of people close to my family or me have all been pretty old, so it was weird to have someone my parents’ age in their fifties die.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
blog question 13
However, I think that foreign travel is simply one of the greatest components of my ideal community. Even though I have not been a particularly devout Christian; I am probably what both atheists and fundamentalists would call an "accommodator," or what I like to call "progressive." What this means to me is that I find the social gospel as compelling and important as the spiritual component. I therefore want, most of all, to join the community of community builders and human developers who work overseas. I don't believe that it is my duty to bring the message of Jesus to foreign heathens. I do believe that people in Latin America, Africa and the Middle East are hungry, poor and hurting- and I have a calling to try and make a difference. I don't know if I will immediately set off on this goal, because I'm going to have a chunk of debt to pay off after college. I just know that I don't want to fall into a trap of easy living.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Shifting Idealistic Desires to my Realistic Future...
So it appears Joe's blog is the hot topic this week. I might not have read it except when I signed on to our blog Annie had linked Joe's blog to hers so I was interested and I read. Besides the Peace Corps, I have similar dreams as Joe. I would love to spend the next few years traveling the world. Initially I'd like to backpack from country to country and then I'd like to stay for 6 months to a year in a few countries and work. So if there was a vagabond community I could be a part of until I became old and decrepit that would be just lovely.
But I imagine that even after being a vagabond for say 10 years, this carefree exploring lifestyle would even get a little dull. Exploring the world wouldn't be as exciting and I would be ready to settle down with a solid job and begin the stereotypical family life. I would work as long as I physically could because without a job I think I would feel like I lacked purpose and would be bored. But when it came time to retire, I want to retire in a golfing community and golf every day. But if I never had kids or they all died in some tragic accident I would definately retire somewhere like Italy or Greece though.
So I think this response turned into a rambling answer and might not have exactly answered the question. But honestly I wouldn't care what community I belonged to or if I was rich or poor as long as I was traveling the world and had enough money for my morning coffee. But this vagabond lifestyle is idealistic. Paying this much to go to this school and then just blowing all my money traveling the world for ten years doesn't really make sense. So I just have to put my head back on straight. Realistically, I'll become a graduate of American University, work for a couple of years, probably get my MBA somewhere and become a member of that community, then move somewhere and be a part of a neighborhood community, be a member of a church community, and be a member of a work community. Sounds so standard, so typical...so boring. I think at one point in my life I'll have some experience that has me become involved in some unique community. I hope this does happen, but at this point I can't even imagine what that community will be.
So in the process of writing this blog I shifted my thoughts from an idealistic community to a realistic one...I'm not sure if I like it.
Response 13: I belong with the rich and famous... theatre geeks?
Besides from that, it's always been a dream of mine to join the community of professional entertainers. Acting, singing, and dancing have always been my passions, but I value having a stable career over possible homelessness. But it would still be amazing to be apart of that community. And it truly is a community. Have you ever met theatre people? They are the most fun, energetic people on the planet. And I LOVE THEM! Since coming to AU, I've realized that some of my favorite people here are part of the performing arts program. To be surrounded by my theatre homies all the time, and to be able to put my stuff out there on the stage every night, that would be a dream come true.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Paths to Community
Monday, November 30, 2009
Reflection 14: A late Thanksgiving reflection
I was terribly unproductive over break. I tried doing some homework, but ended up watching Say Yes to the Dress in my spare time. There was like a marathon on everyday! It was VERY distracting. Not distracting enough, however, to make me forget about my interesting family dynamics. I just seemed to cause loads of trouble right when I got home. I fell asleep in the bathroom and left the hot water running in the shower. I went to grab a pillow off the couch and spilled my mom's tea all over the magazine-laden table. My mom says I came back from college more opinionated, more stubborn, and much lazier. Then she freely told my psychiatrist how I'm the high maintenance one in the family, and how quiet its been without me in the house. Thanks a lot Mom, I love you too. At least Dad says he missed his little girl! XP
But anyways, I was really excited for Thanksgiving. It has extra importance for me especially because it starts this huge holiday triad for my family. First, there's the traditional turkey dinner at Aunt Judy's house, the big matriarch of my family. It's not quite traditional per say, since Aunt Maria brought Chinese-style duck from Chinatown and we ate more flan than apple pie. Second is Christmas at my house, which it always has to be. We held it at Uncle Johnny's one year, and everyone agreed Christmas was MUCH better at my house. It causes a lot of cooking stress for my mom, and she sometimes wishes she didn't have to entertain all these stinkin relatives, but she does it to keep us kids happy. Otherwise Uncle "Never RSVPs" Billy wouldn't even get invited. Third is Chinese New Year. Chinese New Year is a huge holiday for my family. We're not quite sure who's holding it this year, but all that matters is that I'm gettin money! I'm afraid the haul will be a little lacking this year due to the economic downturn, but I think I'll be alright as long as nobody gives me 2 dollar envelopes. That's just a waste of time. But seriously, Chinese New Year brings everybody together one last time before the summer. We can bring guests too since it's a little less formal. For example, I brought my bff Jemila, and we got to play our Chinese orchestra music for everybody. It's also the perfect holiday to test out new boyfriends. ;)
So yeah I'm gonna end my post here. It's too long already. To recap: going home for Thanksgiving break is SO awkward, but happy, and the start to a jolly holiday season. I can't wait till winter break! (Unlike my mother. jk!)
Thanksgiving Reflection
If humans are no different than the lowest forms of life in that we are fundamentally motivated by survival, then where do all the elements that most define humanity fit in? Why do we have the ability to appreciate food, music and other forms of beauty; why is it that humans most cherish memories that deal the most with our own pleasure, rather than those which teach us lessons? Thanksgiving Day and all the satisfaction accompanies it is incongruous with Heinlein philosophy.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Back!
Reflecting a pie
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Reflection 12....YUMMMM
Question 12...Atta Boy Heinlein
So basically I know this isn't before Thursday and I already have nine blog posts; but my parents dropped me off back at school early, I really don't have anything to do, and I actually did want to answer this question but just didn't get around to it while I was with the family....so I said, why not answer an extra blog question? This is just one example of my incredibly full life...
Obviously someone can always nitpick about a certain type of community where being prepared for war is not necessary to survive, but in general Heinlein is correct when proposing this theory. In smaller communities, the police force is important. In larger communities like countries, the armed forces are important. Without these forces, all hell would break loose. In the beginning, people with morals would continue on the path they are on, but that wouldn't last long as other people began to break the once enforced laws.
Let's be like Einstein now and do a thought experiment and look at the idea of militarily preparing a community from a macro perspective and only focus on countries. Let's say all countries agreed to abandon all types of military forces on the condition that no country will use any type of violence to solve an issue. Think about it...is there anyway this would realistically work in our world? No. There's always going to be that one country that secretly keeps their armed forces and war equipment in tact in case the need to use it were to arise. In this case, other countries might keep their weapons in case one country is actually breaking the treaty to save their weapons (this sentence really isn't clear, but hopefully you get what I'm talking about). Everyone abandoning their weapons just isn't going to happen. So its absolutely vital that a country maintain a strong militaristic base so that in case the need were to arise, they would have the addequate amount of power necessary to protect themselves and maintain their community.
This thought experiment is kind of similar to why Communism really wouldn't work. If everyone gets paid the same, there's no incentive to work hard. So one person starts slacking. If other people see that this person is slacking and still getting paid the same amount, then they might as well slack off too. Pretty soon everyone is slacking off and less is getting accomplished. The parallel can be drawn between slacking off and maintaining war products and troops.
Becaues there's always the possibility that others may be prepared for war, everyone has to be prepared for war in order to ensure the continuation of their community. Maybe Heinlein wasn't right in saving that the necessity to survive always ensures that a military must always be among the highest priorities of the community, but he's certainly right the majority of the time.
The Struggle
If Heinlein is correct and humans have evolved to accept a certain code called "morality" and that our morals then constitute another construct called "society," humans should instead become more peaceful and cooperative. Hundreds of thousands of years ago, when the the negligible human population was struggling to survive, only the most cohesive groups would have survived, and they would have survived by adopting practices that encourage cohesion.
Some biologists predict that evolution should result in the eradication of charitable and self-sacrificing individuals. Why is this not the case? Because people realized that the best way to survive is through cooperation instead of force. Even if survival is all there is- I expect that a future society would have evolved even further towards this understanding- ridding the world of violent, self-destructive societies.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Reflection 13
In Heinlein's book, the collapse of Western democracy arrived after violent crime was so prolific citizens literally couldn't leave their homes, and only because the kids weren't subject to enough discipline. "Well golly gee, why didn't those kids' parents take more time to teach 'em discipline? Now that we have corporal punishment and public floggings to look forward to, none of us kids act like that." That's right bland, utterly one-dimensional character, beatings are required by law in Heinlein's utopia. That is why this book strays from reality into fantasy.
Especially living in DC, we have to realize that, socially and economically, we do not live on "a level playing field." When you have to work two or more jobs to support your family, you do not have the same time or energy as do middle-class workers. When you go to poor schools in the inner-city, the culture among educators is unfortunately that some types of kids are unteachable and are better abandoned to their fate. Not so in the thousands of suburban schools, public and private. Young men do not commit crimes because they are thinking about the consequences; they do not intend to get caught at all. They commit crimes out of immediate necessity, the "instinct to survive," Heinlein's basis for all morality. Kids don't join gangs because they find violence fun, they do it because a gang offers the only semblance to a real family they can find. The cycle of violence in urban America won't chance if we instill corporal punishment as a means of rehabilitation. All that will result in is a generation of black, Latino and rural poor resenting even more a government which punishes them for being poor.
Reflection - Native American History Museum
I was thinking about how this projection could be entirely accidental and I could just be attempting to explain something that isn't really seeking explanation. Even still, it caused me to think about how the Native American culutre is not only historically represented, but also represented today.
...On a side note, one thing PTJ mentioned was to think about what the circular room you first walk into represented. When i walked in I looked up and noticed the circular skylight. I immediately thought back to what I learned about Native Americans in elementary school. The teepees that the Native Americans lived in had a hole in the center so that the smoke from the campfire had somewhere to escape. Its so interesting to me how architectual aspects of a particular building representative of a culture cause one to remember certain aspects of said culture.
Reflection 13: Another 5:00am reflection...
I am quite enjoying Starship Troopers. I don't read much science fiction, but I do watch it. Me likey spacey stuff (lolz). Some scifi books get too deep and confusing for my tastes. Starship Troopers is no Fahrenheit 451, which I am GLAD of. While one of my darling roommate found the opening battle scene boring and poorly written, I LOVED it. The gadgets and tactics they used were fascinatingly alien (pun intended) to me. It was like a little glimpse into a different culture for me. It revealed the personality of the main character, how his life worked, and the alien part of this whole story (the aliens, duh). It made me hungry for more. So I tore up the next couple chapters waiting for the next battle scene. I instead was met the most cliche depiction of a training camp I've ever read. I swear, I've seen the entire sequence with first meeting Sergeant Zim in a movie. The whole time reading I was thinking, "Oh come on? Really?" I've seen it so many times; the commanding officers sees his new recruits for the first time and spits in their face. Then he challenges them to fight him. He whips their asses (ah-dur!). Then a little unsuspecting Asian dude pulls out the supa-dupa kungfu and lands the commander on his ass instead. OMG I was dying!!! This was totally the scene of an old war movie! I really don't like to think Heinlein copied this cliche crap. I'm just gonna say he wrote this first before anybody else did. I see not other explanation for it except Heinlein did this on purpose to get his readers to see how similar present military to this scifi military. But if this is the case, couldn't he have done something different? SERIOUSLY.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Bonus Question: To other, or not to other? That is the bonus question...
A major theme in many American Indian culture was the connection between stages of life, color, and the four seasons. One culture correlated adulthood with north and the color red, while another put adulthood in the east and the color was yellow. Symbols for death, birth, and the like changed with each nation, but there was still this theme of the cardinal directions symbolizing different stages in life, elements, and objects like corn and wheat. This way of categorizing life is certainly a tool of remembrance. It creates an order of the complicated world and made it manageable and teachable. The nuances of each culture was shown in the different ways they categorized similar things.
When it comes to othering the American Indians, I think the museum really tried its best not to create the "ooh look and the funny Indians" affect. Contrary to what my chill homie Tonks says (I was looking through other peoples blog post and I just knew I was gonna disagree with her), I didn't see the striking contrast between us versus them. On the top floor, they explored the cultures and customs of several A.I. nations (I'm getting tired of typing, sorry), which you have too if you're gonna make a flippin museum. What was good was that in each little section, they put up pictures and little bios of people alive today who were members of those tribes. The entire second(?) floor was devoted to the lives American Indians today, which I thought was really nice. This exhibit highlighted the incorporation of their culture with modern American culture. There was one display of a modern American Indian living room (idk why, seems kinda weird to me, but w/e). A museum-goer next to me said, "Damn, that looks just like a regular house!" aka it looked like a normal house. This exhibit showed that the American Indians are just like every other American, yet they haven't lost their precious culture. I think this was a great way to balance out the natural othering effect a museum creates on its own.
Making a museum in general others the American Indians. But then again, so does every other celebration of ethnicity. The Chinese New Year parades, Puerto Rican Day parades, even Gay Pride events other the individuals that partake in them. You can't avoid othering when everyday life involves the automatic classification you make in your mind of every person you see. Like Lucia says in her response to esta pregunta extra (I had to look up bonus on google translate lolz), the is "more a celebration of American Indian culture". For this reason I give the American Indian museum some props. Word.
P.S.- Having bangin food helped a bit too ;)